I don’t dig into my own personal journal as much as I probably should, but today will be a much needed exception. I hope you guys can relate.

For a long time, I was a con artist. But it had nothing to do with me deceiving my loved ones or even preying on unsuspecting strangers. Instead, it was a classic case of me pulling the wool over my own eyes. That’s right, I was conning myself. The nature of the con was brilliant too. I had effectively convinced myself that when it came to relationships, I could do no wrong. So anytime there was trouble in paradise, it was automatically her fault.

If we were arguing, then it must have been her doing.

If the spark was gone, then she must have let herself go.

If one of us was contemplating cheating or leaving, then she obviously needed to get her act together.

And on and on it went. As for my own role, well I starred as the blameless boyfriend. And I played it to perfection. But one day, I experienced a life altering occurrence (another story for another day), which forced me to take a long, hard look in the mirror. I didn’t like what I saw. That blameless boyfriend was completely covered in scars and other unsightly blemishes.

So you mean it wasn’t ALWAYS her fault?

And are you trying to tell me that I contributed to some of the relationship problems that I had experienced in the past?

Believe me, it was a hard pill to swallow. But once I grasped the idea that we are all imperfect beings striving to coexist with another imperfect being, then the spell of the con artist (myself) was finally lifted, leaving me better equipped to navigate the choppy relationship waters of life. You see, it’s not always about who is right or wrong. Instead, it’s about who is humble enough to stand tall and admit where their own faults lie. It’s also about who is willing to meet the other person halfway, and work through the minor issues that are brought about when two DIFFERENT people try to live life as one. I learned that lesson. And I’m a better man today because of it.

My point for sharing this is that I know I’m not alone. In fact, there maybe someone reading this right now that is still allowing the con artist within to feed them this false sense of perfection. It’s time to break the spell … right here, and right now. Once you’re able to face your own shortcomings, it will allow you to not only improve yourself, but to also improve the overall health and wellness of your present and future relationships.

Are you with me?