Do You Really Know How To Rate Yourself?

Jun 15th, 2011 | Author: | Category: Fly Perspectives
Comments (3)

A major problem in the dating world is there aren’t enough people willing to give themselves an honest self-evaluation. This lack of internal honesty starts to create a problem when the advances of deserving people are dismissed with phrases like “I can’t be with them … they aren’t on my level.”

Now in some instances, I can agree with such an assertion. For example, if Lester from “227″ starting putting the moves on Halle Berry, then I wouldn’t be mad at her for saying that. (That thick mustache alone should disqualify him.)

But in most cases, there is no Halle Berry in the equation. Instead, it’s just people who undeservedly place themselves on a Halle Berry/Brad Pitt-like pedestal where they unfairly look down on others. Case in point, I have an associate who truly believes that she’s a “dime.” She’s even gone so far as to put “certified-dyme” in her email address just to remind everyone of her perceived dime status.

On a certain level, I can appreciate her high level of confidence, and even applaud her unwavering belief in self. The only problem is that there just aren’t many facts to support her position. Let me run down her stats for you:

–she’s not very attractive.
–she’s not in good shape.
–she’s only borderline successful.
–she has a really bad attitude.

In short, she’s the anti-dime (not trying to be mean, just stating facts.) But even with all of those strikes against her, she still consistently turns down decent guys since they aren’t “a dime like she is.”(her words, not mine.) She’s not alone though, as this type of thing happens ALL THE TIME.

So what am I saying?

Do I think people should lower their dating standards? Absolutely not. I just think that more people should be honest with their own rating before they determine what that standard is. Make sense?

My sister recently sent me a video that provides a perfect explanation of this idea. After watching the video, cast your vote and share your thoughts with me on the subject of date ratings.

Fly Disclaimer: This is pretty funny stuff.

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  • Lady

    Lol that video is pretty funny.

     I think its important to be honest with yourself. Not necessarily for the purposes of dating, but reflection and self-evaluation is always important for those who want to improve on themselves and reach their maximum potential.

    Rating scales are so subjective though…. I try not to be concerned about them, or at least the one’s that are not my own. I evaluate myself, I evaluate the people I allow myself to be surrounded and I act accordingly, but largely keep my findings to myself. Me letting the next person know that I’m unimpressed will not help them lol. And honestly, unless I’m their boss or their a dude tryna get next to me, it doesn’t matter anyway haha. I mean, it would be great if we could get one certified consensus on beauty, attractiveness, “dimenicity”, etc., but realistically, that will never happen. We’re all looking for something a little bit different.

    As far as how rating informs my dating practices…. I’ll be honest, my standards for the dudes I date are really high, but no higher than the standards that I’ve held for myself. And either way, you have to screen dudes out somehow!

  • Alwillwin

    Wow, in reading this, I learned I underrate myself. In an effort to date a man in my community of Newark, NJ I have allowed low standards from the caliber of man; i.e. I’ve traveled the world, successful changed careers and am a fun-loving person, but I am giving Raheem (the time of day) when all he has chosen to do is go to jail and make babies. SMDH

  • Alwillwin

    @07c4d54e125216f04cb0ce2225d460c8:disqus , i’m just chosing to screen them out not, although i have always known it. enjoyed reading your post.