The Reintroduction of the Fly Guy

Allow me to reintroduce myself. If you believe in things like birth certificates or the facts on a driver’s license, then my name is DeWayne Rogers—middle child of three, and product of a mother and father who have been “happily” married for 35 years. I put happily in quotation marks, because like any couple that has been together for that long, they’ve experienced their fair share of ups and downs.  Some days you’d swear the characters Heathcliff and Claire Huxtable were modeled after my parents. But then on other days, I seriously wondered as a child if my parents were going to make it.

Thankfully, they did.

By witnessing their ability to persevere, my own perspective on love and relationships was born. My baptism in the waters of the Rogers’ household taught me the harsh realities of love—realities that dispelled my initial belief that true love was easy.

Through the help of my parents, I learned that it was actually quite the opposite … love was far from easy. Truth be told, a far more fitting adjective for love would be “resilient.” Say it with me: RESILIENT. That would describe my parents. You see, they never believed in giving up on each other, and by doing so, they provided their children with a living, breathing example of love.

I appreciate them for that.

Unfortunately, every child isn’t privy to that type of upbringing. And you know what? It shows.

It shows by the way we treat each other.
It shows by the way we disrespect each other.
And it most certainly shows by the way we constantly give up on each other.

In my heart, I knew something had to change.

The Birth of a Fly Guy

Although I can’t remember the exact moment that I officially began to label myself as “The Fly Guy,” I can safely say that the transformation began a little more than 4 years ago. At the time, I was in search of a professional identity, and in the midst of that search, I woke up to find my love life in shambles.

The woman that I had pledged my life and my love to had stopped believing in us, and had expressed as much by “spending time” with other men. That was the first and only time that I had ever experienced a broken heart, so you can imagine what I was going through. But what’s interesting is that I never became depressed, and I never swore off love … I just couldn’t … I believed in it too much.

**I believed that when expressed properly, love was God’s most beautiful creation.
**I believed in love’s regenerative powers—that even though I was temporarily hurt, my heart would be renewed.
**I believed that we all on some level desire to share a fulfilling relationship with another person.

With those fundamental beliefs in tow, I began to write. And by sharing the outpouring of my heart, I discovered a genuine calling on my life. Today, I sincerely believe that part of my “life’s work” is to assist in the world’s rediscovery of healthy, authentic, resilient relationships.

I understand that the work is far from done. And I also understand that I’m battling with my own personal issues that sometimes get in the way of the work. But as I continue to work on me, I pray that you’ll see past my shortcomings and accept the spirit of my message.

So now that we’ve been formally reintroduced, feel free to call me whatever feels right. If Fly Guy feels good, then go for it. And if DeWayne is more your speed, then I’ll certainly respond. Just know that whatever you decide to call me, I promise to answer you and to address your needs to the best of my abilities.

I stand before you today as a man who selfishly wants us to be united by one common bond. Love.

Fin … for now.