Protect Your Relationship

It’s been close to three weeks since I’ve expressed myself through written word. During that period, I’ve received my fair share of people all asking the same question:

“Hey, what’s up with your website Fly Guy?”

I ignored them all though … every single person.  And it’s not like me to blow people off, but I just didn’t feel like discussing what was going on with me (I’m sure we’ve all been there.) For starters, my website was hacked and blocked by Google, which essentially stripped me of my primary mode of communication with you. So every time someone would attempt to visit Flyguychronicles.com, they were instantly met with a terse warning urging them to avoid my site at all costs. (I’m getting mad just thinking about it.)

It took me a while to get angry about it, though. The first time I logged onto my site and saw it was blocked, I shrugged it off. I mean, it had to be an honest mistake that would immediately get cleared up, right?

It didn’t.

As the days began to pile on, and the problem persisted, my indifference turned to panic.

“What the f*@k is going on with my site and how can we make it right?!?!?”

That was the message I sent to my webmaster Chris at least 5 to 6 times a day.  It got to the point where I started making irrational decisions. “Just erase it all. Destroy the website and let’s start over.”

Slowly that panic turned to anger.

“How could someone be so petty and add a virus to my site? Well, if they want it that bad, they can have it. F#@k it all!!!!!” (Note to my mother: I wasn’t really cursing … I just said that to add dramatic effect to this story.)

When I reached that point, I knew I had to dial it back and focus my energy on taping into a higher power to seek wisdom, guidance and balance to deal with the situation. Once I did that, I realized that this was a learning opportunity for us all.

When it comes to relationships, we often happily float along, as if nothing bad could ever happen. “We’re in love, and everything is good” is what you tell yourself and anyone that will listen. And you may be good. But so was my website, as it was experiencing phenomenal growth. But I was too busy focusing on my success to ever think that with higher visibility comes the increased risk of problems. It never crossed my mind to do occasional spot checks to make sure my security was fortified and up to date. Instead, I was lulled into a false sense of security thinking the firewalls that protected me three years ago would still be effective today.

That was faulty logic.

But it’s the same logic that many of us apply to our love lives. We think that the same dinner and a movie, the same conversations, and the same birthday presents are all that’s needed to keep our relationships safe and intact. That couldn’t be further from the truth. As the two of you continue to evolve, so too should your methods of staying connected and fortified within your relationship.

Because the moment you let your guard down and become complacent about the health and well-being of your love life, that’s the moment you open yourself up to the same metaphorical dangers that I exposed myself to with my website.

I’ve learned my lesson though, and I’m happy to say that I officially have my website back. Going forward, I’ll constantly check in and find new ways to make sure that things are good with my site. I’d suggest you follow my lead with your significant other. Work to discover new ways to grow closer. And as they change, grow and evolve, so should the way that you relate to them. If you don’t, you’ll find out that your methods are as out-dated and obsolete as my firewall was.

Are we on the same page?