A Closer Look At The Chris Brown Apology
Jul 22nd, 2009 | Author: The Fly Guy | Category: Fly Perspectives
Comments (12)
As the Chris Brown apology continues to make its way around the Internet, a few thoughts immediately entered my mind after watching his speech. Before I present those to the group, here’s a brief excerpt from the transcript.
“I wish I had the chance to live those few moments again, but unfortunately I can’t. I’m not gonna sit here and make any excuses! I take great pride in being able to exercise self-control and what I did was inexcusable. I’m very sad and very ashamed about what I’ve done. My mother and my spiritual teachers have taught me way better than that.
I have told Rihanna countless times and I’m telling you today that I’m truly, truly sorry and that I wasn’t able to handle the situation better. I’ve done a lot time soul searching, and over the last several month’s I’ve talked to my minister and my mother, and I’ve spent a lot of time trying to understand what happened and why. I’ve let a lot of people down and I realized that. No one is more disappointed in me than I am.”
The Complete Apology
1. Should He Be Forgiven?
That’s the major question at the center of the Chris Brown/Rihanna debate. For me, his situation is no different from any other guy that loses his temper and hits a woman. In all instances, it takes more than an “I’m sorry” to make things right. Too often words are the substitute for action. For Brown and any other man that resorts to domestic violence, (1)remorse, (2)action and (3)a sincere effort to address their temper is the only path capable of leading them to the forgiveness they so desperately desire. Words alone will never cut it.
2. Will Others Get Help?
I can’t begin to tell you how many emails I get from women suffering from domestic abuse in their relationships. And while I work in private to help in any way that I can, it’s time to make a public appeal to the group. If you or someone you know is a victim of domestic abuse, please seek help immediately. You can start by visiting the National Domestic Violence Hotline or by calling them at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233).
If you’re a guy that has trouble controlling his temper, and you need to talk about it, email me at flyguychronicles@gmail.com
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as a young lady not much older/younger than these individuals i feel that as human beings we are always faced with certain tests that set us up to fail. he certainly did have a terrible lapse of judgement, and i can not say that i do or do not believe him because quite frankly only time can tell, and at this moment he is the only person that truly knows his sincerity. being in the public eye certainly provided some sort of reality check in such a situation and it saddens to see the public backlash at this incident because people are acting as though he is the first man to ever do such a thing. how would the world have reacted had rihanna been the one to bust his lip and punch him repeatedly. the way that the community has ostracized him, to me, is rather unacceptable, how can we help someone if we eliminate contact with said person.
I was dead when he said “I have told Rihanna countless times and I’m telling you today…;”LMAO. He put SO much emphasis on the words I HAVE TOLD RIHANNA. All I heard was “Look! bitch-es…, I said sorry to her already so back up off me.” bahwwww ha ha.
On another note, I do not feel the public backlash has been that bad; its a process similar to what Kobe went through and look how he’s doing to today . I wish his PR would educate him ( and his dumb ass friends) on how its going to go down. He’s apologize so he’s on the right track. And I do not know where Ashelee has been reading but most of the people in the the community has embraced him more esp the females. Hell, a lot of people embrace him while tearing Rihanna down in the process.
I noticed that too. He did get extra aggressive when he said that line, lol
I can’t wait until Chris Brown comes back on the scene with some new music. Him and Brian McKnight need to do a track together. Doesn’t he beat women too? Or is that Joe I’m thinking about…lol.
I don’t believe a man should ever have to hit a woman, and what happened between him and Rihanna is sad. They both are young in age and I hope they both grow as people and learn discipline and self control. Sometimes feelings can get out of hand and it’s between the couple if they go separate ways or find a resolve. I do not believe a man should ever lay hands on a woman though, and recently a guy I’ve been dating for 5 months told me his last relationship ended because he slapped her. Though I appreciate his honesty I’m confused as to how to feel…
Perhaps he should consider serving his sentence, attending counseling and then come back and apologize once more.
i forgive him…just like any other sinner in the world..sin is sin..no greater than the other..who are we to judge..God is the only one he has to answer to..not us..cause at the end of the day..get over it and let the man feed his family…
I saw this article on global grind and had to come in and comment..i do agree with you 3 steps however I have to give a different perspective to chris browns case..this boy grew up in a violent home.. he saw first hand what happened and swore he would never do that again.. He meets rihanna, she also grew up in a broken..now from all the things I have been reading about her before and after the incident point to her being of a violent nature..chris on the other hand was more the good guy and still is refered to as that even after the incident..people who know him cannot just stick up for him for no reason.. This has come from numerous stars across the board..if it came from one person or people really close to him I would question it but comes from numerous people everywhere..rihanna on the other hand, I have not read anyone contradict those reports of her being of a violent nature..not even one person.. all those who say she is sweet and nice its people who just met her or know her by just looking her when she in the papers or on tv..that to me does not represt the true character of a person..Rihanna herself admitted to breaking a bottle on her brothers head.. now numerous reports have surfaced that before the incident and during the altercation she has and hit him.. I refuse to believe that affidavit because what I read did not make sense.. I saw the photo and reading from what the say happened, the injuries do not eqaute which leads to me conclude that some of those injuries when were not due to chris punching her lights out as they say..so why I am saying all this, rihanna has been phyisically and emotionally abusing this boy for such a lot time..i can strongly say this statement because as I pointed out that the reports I have read before and after the incident clearly lead to that..this boy has refrained himself up until that night..he was taught better than that and from what he saw he always tried not to follow the same route but everyone has a breaking point..his actions are no different to a woman who gets abused every single day till one day they have enough and kill their counterpart..the woman will obviously get arrested and charged but does this make the woman a poster child for murder???? No!! So why are you making him the poster child for domestic violence??? You can argue that he could have taken this to trial blah blah but i can definitely tell you the it was not his decision to go the route because he tried through the “I am not a monter” video to speakout..he did not appologise to date because he feels he was the one wronged and I believe that…chris has done everything for his career so why act out now if he actually did what they say he did..you point out he gets aggressive when he mentions her name, that is most probably because he is..he is being forced to admit guilt yet all this time he has been the one abused..part of his punishement is to attend dv classes which I though was absolutely odd yet he has never charged with domestic violence..what I would agree is for him to take anger management because he is angry and that is what he needs..he did not willingly just go and stike rihanna because he woke and felt like it..She however did start to strike him because beating is the way she knows how to deal with issues..this has been reported and that is what abusers do, they use fists to deal with emotion ..chris only reacted after he was being beaten. numerous reports have said that has hit him before and used to verbally attack him..some say he could have walked away but just like every abused person today you become accustomed to your environment..men also get abused every single day and very few of them speak out..Not because they do not want to but because they are ashamed and dnt know any better..what chris needs if anything is anger management, he needs to speak out and talk about what happened(not hide anything) and get therapy on being abused and being a victim of abuse(his childhood)..in my view he was never the abuser but the victim who just did what any other abused victim would do..that is what he needs help on!!!i have just simply taken all the facts as I read them and saw what was going and have come to this conclusion.. domestic violence is real..it happens to both men and woman and just because chris put his hands on her that day does negate all the abuse she has subjecting him to.. To label him as an abuser or woman beater and is just not right!! Sorry for the long post.
sorry for the typos as well..
You know, I think people forget this is a young guy, I know I remember doing some really dumb things that I wish I could make go away. To be honest, I really don’t care too much about the apology. I care more about the solution. Yes he did make a very big mistake, but he needs to be allowed to learn for it and move on. Life is about growing and learning. Some of us will make more mistakes then others, some of us will make bigger mistakes then other. Let’s not judge him on the mistake that he made, but on the steps he’s taking to make sure him, and others doesn’t make the same mistake again.
Some may say I’m crazy BUT! I forgive C. Breezy (actually I believe in forgiving everyone for my own sanity..LOL). I also believe that he is a young brother crying out for help. By NO means should people put their hands on anyone in a violent, controlling way. It is unnacceptable from any and every angle. However, I believe that how Chris and the people around him handle this situation is SO important to his growth as a future boyfriend, husband and father. This brings me to Rihanna. I understand that in Hollywood things are different and she has advisors up the a** about what to do. I DO NOT feel though that we (the public, his friends and family, and maybe even Rihanna) should turn their backs on him. Too may of us do this to men making them feel isolated and in some cases it builds more rage. We are all human, and allowed to make mistakes, but if we can’t be around to pick each other up when we fall, what good are we to one another. We have to stop turning our backs on men in particular when they make mistakes that can be truly forgiven, if that man is truly sincere about changing the nature of that situation. Because we are the SAME people who complain about the state of men today. To get back to my point, the reason I brought up Rihanna is because she she was the other party in this relationship and probably cares a great deal for Chris Brown. I know that she is compelled to put her life back in order, and she is young, so removing herself from the situation all together seems best. As for the bigger picture though, hopefully she will find it in her heart to (even if not directly) to show that she cares. He’s acknowledging to the world that he is sorry to HER, and I just feel she should show that she doesn’t view him as a complete screw up for life…so that that kind of feeling does not carry over into the rest of his life. Just my opinion…
You know what’s crazy? How everyone will probably be quick to forgive Chris for what he did (although he has apologized and all)…..and there are STILL going to be millions of women chomping at the bit to get with Chris in the future just because he’s a singer (well, dancer—personally, I don’t think he can actually sing that well) and he’s got money. Real talk—-what if this would have been your average Joe from around the way who’d hit his at-that-time girlfriend? Y’all would have ran his ass out of town on a rail already….his picture would be all over Facebook, Twitter, MySpace, AND TMZ.com as the type of man women need to avoid….hell, he’d be more famous for the WRONG reasons than he probably bargained for. LOL!