Romance 101 with Lance and Eva

Yes it is possible to love a person too much. You’ll end up living for that person instead of living for the both of you. Pushing your needs and wants and dreams to the side will only come back to bite you in the ass later. As for public displays, hell yeah you should show it. I mean not the “get a room” thing but yawl know what I mean.

It is definitely possible to love a person too much, especially if you struggle with low self esteem, psychological scars, etc. Sometimes a person who is not whole will try to compensate by pouring love on a person, hoping for that person to love them back in such a way that will fill whatever void may be in their life. It is impossible to find completeness in another person. If you don’t love yourself to only accept someone who is giving to you as much as you are giving to them, then you are in a world of trouble.

I’m not big on really “graphic” public displays of affection. Holding hands, walking with your arms around each other, maybe even a quick kiss are okay. You should not make strangers voyeurs into a heated makeout session, nor is public groping ever appropriate.

If love is supposed to be unconditional, who’s to say one is loving someone too much and how could that even be measured? Having too much focus on another is probably a better way of looking at it…

I agree with Blaze uncondtional means not measured. No such a thing is I love you just a little bit or I love you THIS MUCH. Love is, is what love does PLAIN AND SIMPLE

Only differences in love that I have known thus far is being in love or you just love someone. People love in different ways.

The various definitions of love will make the responses here vary wildly. But, all “love” is not true love or unconditional love, so there is room for one to possess an unhealthy affection towards another person. That one may think what they are feeling is love, even true love, but it really isn’t. And that person can overindulge that emotion, thereby causing them to “love” someone too much.

It still goes back to the point on how can you measure what is “true love” and who’s to say if it really isn’t true love since they’re are various definitions of love? I feel if the emotion (love) exists within someone, rather if its overindulged or vaguely expressed, its real…for that person.

never questioned the validity of someone’s emotions, just stated that there are many definitions of love. Not all of those definitions fall within an “objective” definition of unconditional. Neither do all of those definitions result in positive benefits for the lover and lovee. While there is no hard and fast rule, and there is no way to remove subjectivity from a matter as emotional as this, most people can identify unhealthy behaviors when they see it (or after the fact, when they don’t).

Unhealthy behavior and loving someone too much are two entirely different things….objectively and subjectively.

Even in a positive relationship, one is going to express their love more than the other….Have you even accused anyone for loving you too much (within a relationship)?

I just love these two as a couple!

@ blaze:

I take it #9 is directed at me. No, I have never accused someone of loving me too much, excpet this guy in HS who was two years younger than me and said that he was totally in love with me and that I should give him a chance. I told him I had no intention of altering my itchy-bay behavior, and that it was in the best interest of his health and well being if we kept our acquaintanceship confined to school hours. He tracked me down viw the web last year. Scary stuff.

But, unhealthy behavior and loving someone too much are not mutually exclusive. IN the throws of the relationship, one may thinks they love the person. If the relationship sours, one may then feel that they loved the person too much (or loved that other person more than they love themselves, which is really the same thing). Based on what you said, “if the emotion (love) exists within someone, rather if its overindulged or vaguely expressed, its real…for that person” so it is entirely plausible that in May they felt it was love, in October they felt they loved that person too much, and in January they face the fact that they were exhibitin unhealthy behavior in a relationship that didn’t work out.

Unhealthy behavior is different because those type of actions are usually reactions out of fear, anger, and insecurities to name a few.

IMO…Loving someone too much?…Again and I keep saying it, impossible to measure…Thats usually an internal personal feeling for people. Giving too much of yourself too soon upfront is different and some may feel that way after the fact but that doesn’t equate to loving you or having love for you….

Lets not get love misconstrued with just simply expressing a great deal of interest in a person intially.

@ blaze:

I’m curious as to how you can in one post, accept that there are mulitple definitions of love, and that each person’s perception/feelings/beliefs determines how they view love; and yet in several other posts attempt to disregard my perceptions/definitions of love, and the behaviors that go along with each distinct definition? Is your goal simply to get me to agree with you, or to accept your position as the only one that is correct?

Niether….IMO opinion I think loving someone too much and unhealthy behaviors are different. Also, I feel trying to measure if someone is loving another too much is immeasurable…IMO.

You dont have to agree or not.just my opinion.