I’ve Learned
Feb 2nd, 2009 | Author: The Fly Guy | Category: Fly Features
Comments (145)
I was sent an email this morning that really struck a chord with me. In it, the author shared a litany of lessons that he/she had gathered along life’s journey. Not wanting to miss an opportunity to foster positive dialogue among the members of the Fly Guy community, I decided to use parts of the email as a discussion starter. After reading the piece, take the time to answer the question that follows.
I’ve learned
that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is be someone who can be loved. The rest is up to them.
I’ve learned
that no matter how much I care, some people just don’t care back.
I’ve learned
that it takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it.
I’ve learned
that it’s not what you have in your life but who you have in your life that counts.
I’ve learned
that you should never ruin an apology with an excuse.
I’ve learned
that you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.
I’ve learned
that just because someone doesn’t love you the way you want them to doesn’t mean they don’t love you with all they have.
I’ve learned
that no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn’t stop for your grief.
I’ve learned
that just because two people argue, it doesn’t mean they don’t love each other. And just because they don’t argue, it doesn’t mean they do.
Fly Question of the Day: What have you learned?
(Fly Request: I’ve only requested once before that everyone respond, but today I’m coming with a similar request. I think it’s very important to understand what you’ve learned, and how you can apply those relational lessons to life moving forward. So take the next 20 seconds and share with me what you’ve learned. You’ll be amazed at how freeing this process can be.)
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This has worked extremely well for me throughout my career, so I’ll pass it on. Whenever you’re on a job interview, and the interviewer asks you where you see yourself in 5 years, I always say:
“I’ve learned that life never goes the way you planned. So my goal is to learn as much as I can about as many things as I can, so when opportunities present themselves, I can hit the ground running.
I like that one T-Moe. I’ve learned that I am a lot stronger than I originally thought. Everytime I feel like there’s something that I can’t bear, I always manage to gather up enough strength to make it through.
I’ve learned that any moment or situation can change the rest of your life forever. Will you be ready for it?
The first 3 things I have learned as I finally learned how to be patient. I also learned that life is so much better when you are not bitter…
This is a great post and I think we all need to have this posted somewhere we can read it on a daily…
Hmmmm….
I’ve learned-
though it may be cliche’, actions really do speak louder than words.
one of the worst things you can do is change yourself for a relationship that wasn’t meant to be.
there is nothing cute about baggage. Deal with your issues b4 pursuing a new relationship.
loving someone will all you have and all you are is not going to make them do the same.
I’ve learned that no one will believe in you if you don’t believe in yourself.
I’ve learned that forgiveness is the best gift you can give – to yourself, and to those who have offended you.
I’ve learned that what you really want and what you think you want are not as synonymous as you would think.
I’ve learned that loving yourself is the paramount achievement anyone can attain.
I’ve learned that you have to work diligently to balance being conscientious and not being a people pleaser.
I’ve also learned that girly girls get help with their luggage at airports, so leave the buns/ponytails, sneakers and sweats at home.
Great Post Fly Guy,
to keep it short
i’ve learned that only you have the power to control your happiness…i’ve learned that love is a battle, win some & u lose some…finally i’ve learned that if somethings worth fighting for, fight for it.
JAT girl…u a trip..
I’ve learned that just because a relationship didn’t work between you and a certain person, that doesn’t mean something was wrong…it just means there are other things you should be doing. Do them.
taking responsibility and blaming yourself are two entirely different things.
everyone falls in love in different ways and for different reasons. Just because your relationship doesn’t follow the American Dream pattern doesn’t make it fraudlent or any less authentic. Do you…
Love sucks but its inevitable…unless you’re me and JAT and you prefer to build a team and rotate positions for several seasons….
Go Steelers btw…yeah man….
I learned that there’s a lesson in everything- good or bad- that happens, and that people come into and leave your life for a specific reason.
I’ve learned that your perception is your reality…stay positive.
I’ve learned that you can’t change someone that they are who they are and you can accept it or move on.
I’ve learned to let go of people that are negative and that will hold you down..life is too short.
I’ve learned that to receive you must give and that applies to all areas in life.
I’ve learned that…
- the heart is very resilient and can sustain multiple hits.
- learning never stops.
- failures only happen when you only put in minimal effort.
- life is going to continue no matter your current situation. Being depressed or angry only wastes your time.
- you are your own strength and there’s a limitless supply.
- love is and no matter your hopes & dreams for it, it will continue to be.
I’ve learned that love doesn’t conquer all, no matter what people say.
I’ve also learned that some people are only supposed to be in your life for a season and when that season is over, just let them go…
@ Chelsea:
Hey girl!
Sorry chica, I don’t have a team. I’m chillin on the sidelines, watching the game from a distance.
@JAT
Quitter!!! Lol. Fine…I’ll hold down the recruiting, tryouts and contracts for now…just call me the Commissioner…lol
I’ve learned that self-love and self-confidence are vital in life.
I’ve also learned to trust my heart.
Chelz, how have you been?
Hi everybody!!
hey Fab!
Hey Fabie!
And hi to reina, blaze, moe, and the lurkers!
@ Chelsea:
I’ll be that, lol! But I’m not quitting permanently, just on hiatus…
hey errbody…
ok JAT…we’ll see how long u ride the pine (oak?) before u puttin that coach hat back on…now that football is OVER we ladies should be gettin more attention!
**eyes calendar**
Oh pixie sticks…basketball season n March madness n playoffs are soon upon us…nevermind. We still on the back burner…sorry for the false hope…
@Chelz
Whats your new looking like these days?
***team
hello everyone!
hmmm…i got this new dude…he’s from detroit, dark-skinned and he’s 6’5″ (side eye to JAT…hehehe), he’s 22 and a great prospect but i doubt he’ll make MVP. He has an adorable daughter (flag) and he thinks relationships in ur 20s are pointless…
Then there’s one who is the epitome of romantic n sweet…wine n massages, in depth convo, introduced me to his whole circle of friends at a superbowl party last nite…but he’s lackin fire…
got a guy who’s been sweatin me since high school n he’s great but kinda square and not MVP material…basically a fun, well-rounded team. No stand out players tho…still lookin and recruiting….
I’ve learned…
That faith is the evidence of things hoped for (I knew this already but I had to re-learn that)…
That life and death are in the power of the tounge (you have what you say)…
Oh, what can I say that hasn’t already been said? I think everyone’s touched on my list (including Fly Guy). :( Boo.
@Chelz
Seems like you’ve been putting in work. What ever happend to that Chico you had earlier in the year?
U guys call them chicos in DMV too? wow…thought that was a southern thing…
uh…he aint an option. He’s too old n has kids, etc…not what I’m lookin for…plus he’s known around our county for being a….Head Doctor…lmao
Nah, we dont call them anything specific up this way, some of us just know spanish
@ sugarlips:
I’m sure you have a unique spin on some of the insights shared. Everybody has their own flava as to life’s lessons
@ Chelsea:
If you want a dude to do/say the stuff in the “No Other Woman Will Do” post, then you might want to try a square or someone who’s “lacking fire.” ****ducks shoe that Chelsea is throwing at me*****
I agree J, and what exactly is lacking fire? Perhaps you just don’t…. light his fire…..Im just sayin
@ blaze:
always instigating. You know she’s talking about that “edge” that some men have and others don’t. Obviously if he was dealing with her, she lit his fire some kinda way.
@J
Could you please let Chelz answer the question..or do we need to start talking about this hiatus..and what thay truly means
**retrieves shoe**
@JAT
I PROMISE that I try. With the romantic dude I spend a lot of time with him and I always let him know I appreciate all the insanely thoughtful things he does….takes my trash out, sat and waited for the cable guy while I ran errands, raves about how smart n beautiful I am, invites me everywhere he goes, gives awesome foot massages…just so sweet. But he just doesn’t do it for me.
The square? He’s intellectual, can play 20 instruments and sing, has taken me on a few GREAT dates and he’s genuinely listens (they both do)…but I have zero fire for either of them. No sexual attraction, nothing…
But 6’5″? He’s an asshole n challenges me and I can’t keep my hands off him. WTF is my problem?
@Chelsea – aww, give the give square and the guy lacking fuego a chance :) Sometimes once you get to know them better (and they you) those embers will spark… or maybe not. But you never know.
@JAT – Okay, you’re right. Here’s my short list:
– I’ve learned you cannot love enough for 2 people. If you’re both not giving your all, it’s time to move on.
– I’ve learned to trust my gut instincts. If I feel something is right, go with it. If I feel something isn’t right, it most likely isn’t and the truth will come out sooner or later.
– I’ve learned to not lose yourself in a relationship; to keep your identity.
– I’ve learned to never let a relationship with an SO get in the way of your friendships.
– I’ve learned life is too short to stay mad and hold grudges.
– I’ve learned that you don’t have to apologize for being yourself. If someone doesn’t like who you are, how you are, then maybe you need to re-evaluate their position in your life.
– I’ve learned to appreciate all the people that have entered your life, and the events that happen (no regrets). There are life lessons in each of them, if you only take the time to reflect on them, objectively.
@ blaze:
You would start some nonsense when I’m about to leave to go to class. I will deal w/ you tomorrow.
@ Chelsea:
I know how that is. But 6’5″ is trouble, and you know it, and you think you can “break” him. You aren’t proving anything by trying, so avoid the drama and let the nice dudes treat you well, because everyone deserves to be treated nicely. Working for a ninja pays zero dividends.
@ Chelz – Okay, I take back what I said. If you’ve dated them both for a while and you still have no fire for them, let ‘em go. You can’t force chemistry.
As for Mr 6’5? Damn, I love a man with height (as I glance at my new 6’3 boo’s pic, hehehe)… but seriously, be careful with that. Sometimes us chicas interpret that ‘asshole syndrome’ as something else, and start thinking, “what if it’s just a game”, or “I can break him outta that”, or whatever. Next thing you know you’re baby mama #2 chasing his ass for child support cuz he doesn’t think you or this new kid “fit” in his life plan. I’m just saying. LOL
bye JAT…
@”sugarlips”
6’5″ is cool…i like him n he’s hella sexy, but he ain’t it either. I ain’t tryna break him. He’s purely entertainment…
I have concluded that at this point I am content with casual dating. I’m seriously balking at the thought of trying to commit to someone…and Mr. Romance is trying really hard to tie me down and give himself a title. He even says he’s the ‘father’ of my neww puppy Tinkerbell…boy bye!
and 6’5″ says Tink is like my daughter so if he wants to be in my life he has to consider her, so he ALWAYS asks about her when he calls me…which is every morning at 8 and every night between 8 and 10…without fail.
I’ve learned that your biggest mistakes can be your biggest accomplishments
I’ve learned to express my love, and appreciation for someone because if I don’t let them know how I feel, they may never know
@Chelsea
Casual dating is great. Enjoy all that attention! Ain’t nothing wrong with entertainment. And man is right – a man that doesn’t care about your dog isn’t worth caring about :)
I’ve learned that living each day like it’s your last is harder than it sounds… but attempting to do so is fulfilling in itself.
Good morning lurkers!
I’ve learned that until I love God more than myself and anyone else, I will never have the true desires of my heart. While I am happy, young and single, what I want more than anything is to be a wife and mother. While I have the education, the career and the drive, none of it matters without my true heart’s desires. That is what I desire most because that is what i was created to be. many women will frown on me for that, men may question my motives. But, that is what I have very recently learned about myself… and that has made all the difference.
In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life thus far…. IT GOES ON….o yea one more thing…how people treat you is their karma, how you react is yours….
SO I have never posted here before and may be too young, but have been reading these posts on this site for about 2 months now…. It has helped so much…
- I have learned that unless you put yourself and your self worth first, you will never be able to give a relationship your all.
- If you throw your everything into it, you better make sure you are either ready to get hurt or the guy is doing the same
- Life is all about lessons and as much as you want something to work you cant force it to, in the bigger picture you will look back and realize it wasn’t right because if it was it would have worked out.
Hey J…always calling the lurkers out early :-)
@ blue:
Yep. I know they at least peek at the site, but they act like they don’t want to post.
How are you?
i’m good. nothing interesting on my end…how about you?
I usually just lurk but had to respond since Fly guy asked so nicely.
I have learned to never allow someone to become my priority while I remain there option.
I have learned that it’s not what other people think of me that’s important, it’s what I think of me.
I’ve learned…
-If someone desires to be in your life, they will make the effort to
-Sometimes being hurt can teach how to love better
-Each experience will teach you something if you’re willing to learn
Another lurker here…
I’ve learned that people will only treat you the way you allow yourself to be treated.
I think I’m in the process of learning some of these lessons. All I can really say I’ve learned is that I still have a LOT to learn.
**side eyes all lurkers**
glad u all decided to join us! **ques Reina the Welcome Wagon**
@FG
you should ask nicely for input all the time…it gets results!
Morning Family!
Good morning everybody !! These all are lessons that we should keep in mind while dealing with everyone that come and go in our lives, the better we all will be in the end. Not so cynical and bitter for some. ( I GOT A WHOLE LOT BETTER) lmao
I’ve learned that:
…all women lie.
…you should always operate with the end in mind.
…the ruff neck dies first and the nice guy finishes last.
…no matter how hard you try, you can never make a dollar out of 15 cents.
…kids spell love T-I-M-E.
…you can choose your reaction.
…there’s always a lesson to be learned.
…positive thoughts bring positive actions which brings a positive outcome.
…I have not failed. I’ve merely found 10,000 ways that don’t don’t work!
Mernin’ to Blaze, Chels, JAT & the rest of the crew
Whats good Redline…Thx for that info. When are you coming back this way?
@ Redline:
People lie. Men lie just as much as, if not more than, women. Men just fail to realize that saying “no honey, I didn’t eat your takeout” while the barbeque sauce is still dripping from his lips and fingers and the empty carton is on his lap is not the best way to try to cover up the truth.
Mornin Chelsea, blaze, redline, and everyone else!
@Red
man…u are like a Godsend for the XY Alliance…always starting sumthin. imma sit back and let u n JAT have it out **offers Blaze pretzels**
Where’s Reina and Fab and Miss and ‘nem?
@Blaze
My son’s bday is Valentine’s day. I’ll be up then.
@JAT
Naw, women lie more and are better @ covering it up, so it APPEARS as though men lie more.
@Chels
If true telling is starting sumthin’ then I stand guilty as charged! ;-)
Good morning Chelz…
@Red
Make sure you holla at me when you get here..
@Blaze
Will do, maybe we can do something on the 13th.
@ Red:
Methinks thou doth protest too much. I think men and women lie about the same. Men get caught more on the stoopid ish, and a lot of their lies fall by the wayside because some chick wants the man more than she wants her self-respect and sanity. Don’t preach your subjective truth and then get flummoxed when someone else tells theirs.
@Red
you knew a bold, drastic statment like “…all women lie” was gonna incite some rebuttals…don’t act brand new
and happy early bday to ur son…
Morning Blaze…
im coming the last week in Feb!
@Chels
Yeah, I knew it was gonna raise some eyebrows….SO WHAT! lol
@JAT
Flummoxed? Moi? Never that. yeah, dudes lie. but women LIE. everything from this is my hair to he’s just a friend to I haven’t had sex in 6-7 months!
yall need to cut it out.
@Red
13th is good..I’ll set something up
@Chelz
How long are you going to be in town? Field Trip?…lol
@ Red:
Ha! Like dudes don’t pull the I own my own business (i.e. I sell bootleg DVDS and CDs); She’s just a friend (that I have sex with when I don’t see you); No, I’m not married; Naw I didn’t “cut” that girl! I don’t know how she got that naked picture of me on her camera phone; I was at my boy’s house (right before I dipped and went over so-and-so’s house til 5am); I don’t eat coochie (bwahahahahaha, that’s my favorite lie); I got tested last month, so why you want me to use a rubber when it feels so unnatural? I’m only sleeping with you…
I could go on and on. And I don’t know why dudes get all upset about fake hair, when ALL races and ethnicities rock that ish. Dudes don’t care as long as you look good, hence the reason why all the weaved up ladies usually have a dude on their arm. Just sayin…
@JAT
Not THIS dude. I rebuke the weave. I HATEHATEHATE it! I like a natural woman. I don’t wanna have to wonder what you REALLY look like. I don’t give a rat’s ass how “natural” a weave looks…it aint NATURAL. I can’t do it.
I realize that may limit my selection, but I that’s cool by me!
@ Redline:
If you say so.
I’m a little biased because, as a possessor of a natural hairstyle, I have had my share of disappointing encounters w/ brothers who claim to like an all natural woman, but only if by all natural the hair growing out of her head is long and straight (or close to it).
@Blaze
that better not be a reference to my age or we gon be fighting. Just the weekend…i gotta keep the dudes on my team guessing so Imma be bookin outta town or ‘unavailable’ nearly every weekend…including the dreaded ‘V-Day’
@JAT
PREACH SISTA!
@Red
Rebuke the weave? **grabs head** Say it ain’t so!
@JAT
When I say natural, I mean the hair is HERS. I know some women choose to go the route of the relaxer/perm/texturizer. That I can deal with. But the hair doesn’t have to be long. I am currently dating someone with short hair.
Any dude tripping off of your natural, not down to your waist hair is a shallow bastard and you can tell him/them I said so!
@Chels
it is SO. I just can’t get with it.
For the women rocking weaves, would you date a dude with a curl?
^^^ “would you date a dude w/ a curl?” ROTFLMBO!
And no, I wouldn’t. Worst thing about living in ATL was all the dudes w/ texturizers. I took all my might not to let my pimp hand loose on those fools.
@JAT
That’s how I feel about that weave! I give an immediate scowl and keep it moving.
Hi people!
@Red
i wore a Halle Berry cut for years, and my hair is naturally easily shoulder length…I’ve always rocked the occasional weave but never ever has it been obvious and luxurious a la the R&B divas today…my avi pic is weave and so is my default Myspace/Facebook pic…never had a complaint n guys always like it…
and HELL NO! if u aint got a ‘low boy’, brush cut (waves optional…and PLEASE refrain from have a hair brush surgically attached to ur hand….HATE THAT!). ceasar, or (well kept) dreds then u get no second looks from me…a curl/texturizer?
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Boy B-Y-E!
@Chels
I understand your weaves may have been tight. But it’s still a weave. and that would’ve bothered me to no end!
If you’re rocking fake hair, how can u be mad @ a dude for “doing the same”…in a curl?
What’s up Reina?
@ blue:
I know you’re lurking. I’m doing my thug thizzle – school and work, work and school. Trying to get my girlfriends together for an anti V-day bash.
@Red
I don’t dislike the curl cuz its ‘false advertising’…I dislike it cuz its WHACK! So are texturizers…just plain lame and not my thing. If his hair was naturally curly, shiny and wet then that’s his B-I…otherwise I’m probably gonna assume he still has a Phat Farm jersey, rocks Saucony’s and will call me things like ‘Young Thang’, ‘Pretty Fine Brown’, ‘Brown Sugah’ and ‘Tenderoni’…
No and thanks!
@Chels
ok, you made me HOL – Howl Out Loud. my gum flew out my damn mouwf! You sound like Jerome on Martin.
WHats up with this Anti-Valentines Day movement? Is it because none of you (sans Reina) can get a worthy date?
@Red
I’m dead serious.
@Blaze
I would love to be able to be excited about V-Day but I have only had one good one, complete with a date and gifts…in the 10th grade. I’ll save all that for when I’m seriously booed up or whatever.
But this yr I will be drinking wine in a bubble bath listening to the Lloyd album after a steak and bake potato meal and afterwards watching a Katt Williams/Boondocks dvd marathon until I laugh myself to sleep…Happy Lame-entine’s Day to the Chelsmeister!
hmmm…on 2nd thought, I vageuly remember semi-commiting to the guy who’s been sweating me since HS for a Valentine’s date…and I have a feeling the other guy, Mr. Romantic, is gonna wanna tie me down. He’s been hinting at something…yeesh.
yeah…I’m gonna go outta town next weekend. Ix-nay the Lame-entine’s Day plans…
Chelz
Why not spend it with 6’5 or the other dude? Its obvious they’ve put in the time and effort. Or is it too soon? I think if they offer you should kick it with one of them.
@ blaze:
LOL at the can’t get a worhty date. You got jokes.
And FYI, I’m not anti V-day. I love romance and all the mushy stuff. And, I would go out w/ either the youngin or this other dudes that’s been sweating me, except I don’t want to lead them on since I have NO intention of interacting with them after dinner is over. The anti V-day bash is for all my single friends who seem to be peturbed by their single status. I mean, come on. I’m one of the few who works in a traditional office, so if I can withstand the onslaught of flower deliveries, surely they can hold their heads up while driving past the dudes selling teddy bears and roses on the corner.
@J Thought
When was the last time you did something special for a guy?
@Blaze
Cuz I would hate to be disappointed. Plus V-Day is ‘lovers day’…its lot of pressure and like I said I’ll save it for when I’m booed up heavy. I like all the guys on the team but I think now is the time for me to step back and disappear as coach for a hot minute.
Make them miss me….
Chelz
If one of them has potential u should flip the script and do something special for them…
@Blaze
so he can think I’m some emotional, sappy woman who’s trying to make him see she’s in love with him and he’s special to her?
Yeah…I’ll pass. This is too soon of a holiday for any of them (except for maybe my high school buddy)…
I’m bein selfish and want to be pampered on the 14th so I’m gonna do it myself. No pressure, no expectations. And damn sure no ‘special’ plans for any of them…maybe St. Patricks day or sumthin…
i’ve learned that older I get the more my mind grows? i suck at this.
@ blaze:
For the youngin’s B-day, I took him and his friends out for drinks ( i only bought two rounds, cuz he invited fifty’leven people although I specifically said six to eight friends). The next day was dinner and the traditional date thing, on my dime. I also gave him a massage, but that was a bad idea because it was hell trying to get him out of my house w/o him having a happy ending. Oh well, he hadn’t earned the golden compass, so he was not getting it, bday be damned.
Chelz
There;s a way to let a man know you’re thinking about him without coming across sappy or emotional. Its about having a quiet confident vibe about yourself…
@Blaze
I’m comfortable…with not singling any one dude on the team out with special treatment. 6’5″ at this point is my fave…but he has to earn his spot like all others. Its just too soon. They should be trying to show ME a good time. No one has really done anything to warrant one on one time with the Commissioner…
And I thought men abhorred V-Day?
@Chelz
Sounds like your all take and no give? Arent equally trying to earn a spot on his team as well…? Bet you’re even holding the Heismen hostage huh?
@Chels/JAT
Where do you live?
@JAT
no happy ending on his bday?! no hand action…no mouth action? that’s just wrong. lol Is that the same dude that didn’t do jack for your bday?
teams? commissioners? chelsea the hell are you talking about?
@Blaze
see that’s where ur wrong. I haven’t taken anything. I’m not demanding candy or flowers. I haven’t hinted that I like shiny things, nor have I mentioned my affinity for pink. I’m goin to spend that day with the person I love most…moi! Nobody is gonna have to dig in their pockets or give up their Saturday for me, although I’m well worth the effort.
I’m keeping things casual and not pressuring anyone. If I was asking for a date n whatnot by one of the 3 with no plans to reciprocate then I would see ur angle…but I’m not. So how am I wrong?
@J
How do you earn the gold compass? If you did all that for his bday sounds like dude deserved it…stop holding that thang hostage.
@Red
Why do women set these unrealistic expectations by saying a man needs to earn a piece here and there?
@Chelz
So how many dates..per average…do you have to go on with a guy before he gets the Heismen..on average?
blaze when we willingly and generously give you a inch you take a kilometer that’s why.
Hey Miss!
In ur absence, I learned that men are incredibly smart. Sport teams are run very efficiently and they are clear cut. So I’ve adopted that philosphy of a ‘team’ or ‘franchise’ and applied it to my deficient love life…
And it works! I am the Coach/Commissioner and they are the Superbowl Champ hopefuls…I scout and try numerous players, evaulate their performance and edit the team as I see fit, making NON-EMOTIONAL BUSINESS DECISIONS for the greater good of the ‘franchise’ ie ME!
And since I refer to the va jay jay as the ‘Heisman’ anyway, it just seemed like the most suitable direction to go in.
JAT used to be on the same page but now she’s a spectator in the Rose Bowl of Love…HA!
@ Redline:
I’m by FSU.
And there was no action of any kind. It was messed up, but it is what it is.
@ blaze:
I already told you I’m not holding it hostage. It is a privilege. And I’m not setting up unrealistic expectations. I tell dudes upfront I don’t do casual sex, and that I get emotionally attached if things are physical. So, in order for a dude to get the privilege, there has to be a minimum level (which I decide) of emotional attachment from him (and no, wanting to get my goodies does not count). Getting the golden compass is relatively simple, but it is time and effort intensive. If a dude doesn’t want to put forth the effort to get it, then that’s fine. He can go his merry way.
chelsea if that is the case you should refer to your goods as the Lombardi…
@Ms Miss
That works both ways…we give you the goods, you automatically start talking immediate committment…Make us sign the exclusive contract immediately
@Red
Me and JAT live in Florida…me in the south and she is the north
@Blaze
no set number…whenever I feel like it. I’m not holding it hostage now…I’ve just changed my approach and reactions to sex. I’m tellin u…this ‘teaml theory has been working GREAT!
@Miss
hysterical!
geez, trophies, compass’, i just call mine a cookie…
@Miss
Lol…I actually just learned about the Lombardi on Sunday (watchin the Superbowl)…I had never heard of it before…I like Heisman better tho. Catchier…I may use them interchangeably in the future
@Chelz
Give me something…3,4 dates…fully paid dates…then the Heisman? Be honest…
On the real a man expects the goods after atleast 3-4 dates or a month..IMO
@Chels
I will be down your way this weekend. I’m surprised you don’t have those guys “contributing” to your Vday happiness.
2/14 is a big day for me only bcuz it’s my son’s bday. other than that, it’s not special. I try to show my love and appreciation a lil more often than one day in Feb.
@Blaze
there’s no ‘magic number’ or code word or anything…it just happens when it happens. I can’t stress over sex anymore cuz it makes me crazy. I just accept that I’m capable of being highly sexual and that its not a synonym for ‘promiscuous’ or ‘loose’ and let the good times roll. If I felt he’s earned it and that he will appreciate my Chocolately Goodness then it is what it is…
chelsea didnt i tell your ass there is only ONE miss?
Chocolately Goodness??? WTF? Did you get that from cereal commerical..?
@Red
oh ok…its been chilly (smirk) here lately so be prepared. And lmao@’contributing’…if any of these MVP hopefuls plan on bein retained on the team they WILL be contributing…its all about being RETAINED and given an opportunity to fill the much coveted MVP position. Go hard or go home. Thats the reality of being in Chelsea’s League…don’t like it? Return ur jersey and allow security to escort that azz to the left, to the left…
@Miss
you weren’t here! I had too commemerate u in some way…
@Blaze
no, hater…thats all off the dome right there…hush boy
@Chels
BOOOOOOOO @ the chilly weather! what’s the weather supposed to be this weekend?
@Red
check a weather site lazy azz…its YOUR trip.
LMAO…u got a headlock coming when I get to town. then again, I might make your weave crooked.
@Red
why u gotta automatically take ish to violence? *smh* sad…
I’m from DC. that’s what I know…what I do best! lol
hi redline i don’t believe we have met.
@Chelz
U prolly more on the coco puffs or lucky charms level
since we’re talking cereal they have Honey KIX now!
Hey Ms. Miss. I don’t believe I’ve had the pleasure…
@Blaze
I don’t listen to anything you say. You have got to hold the title for the most wishy-washy man on Earth. Boy, bye
@Chelz
LOl…Ok Ms. celibate on again off again.
@Red
Dont become a pedophile messing with Chelz down in S. Florida.
ouch blaze even I felt that…
How long has it been Ms. Miss? I know you’re still reppin
@Blaze
Chels knows she aint nothing coming but a headlock and maybe some arm wrestling!
**eye roll**
child please…I AM LEGAL. R. Kelly would not be the least bit interested should he stumble in my path.
Russel Simmons might tho….
8 months tomorrow
Again with the senseless violence…smh
Common said: One it’ll all make sense.
@ Miss:
Yeah! I have to dig back into my journals to find my number…
@ blaze:
3-4 fully funded dates? Hmmm, guess that’s why I didn’t get anything for my bday.
@ Chelsea:
Chilly? Stop playin! It was a good thirty degrees today up here, so you need to quit complaining.
congrats Miss…
I don’t know if I actually SHOULD be congratulating u, but hip hip hooray any damn way
@ Redline:
Common also said “you talking isht and ain’t sayin’ ooh” Sounds like you my friend. And blaze.
@JAT
hush…I had to break out my ridiculously expensive Ed Hardy jacket the past couple days
***** rolls eyes at Chelsea and puts on her winter gloves because it actually IS chilly in N Florida *****
lol@JAT
chels what do you mean? of course kudos go my way for wearing my chastity belt.
i said it was CHILLY…sheesh!
nothin miss
I enjoyed reading everyone’s comments….
I’ve learned…That you shouldn’t start a new relationship, untill you are over your last. This may be common sense,but some people still don’t get it!
The relationship will not be a success if your still stuck on youe EX…
I also learned there’s 5 key things to look for in a man:
Common respect, conversation, companionship, common ground and common sense. I completely took that from Goodie Mob’s “Beautiful Skin” but it still holds true. :)