The Chronicles

Volume 27- I Could Just Hurt You

So here’s the deal. You’ve been in this relationship for a little while now, and things seem to be going fairly well. But every full moon, it seems like your significant other does something stupid that really irritates you to no end. It could be something as immoral as stealing cable from the orphanage next door, or as irresponsible as locking the keys in the car. Whatever it may be, it never pushes you to the point of breaking up. You just find yourself wanting to shake some sense into them. So today I’ve highlighted Four Things That May Make You Want To Hurt Your Loved One.

Note: Now I’m not saying you should actually do it…but I do understand you feeling that way.

1. They share personal information with others.

In the past, I’ve shied away from sharing my own personal experiences, but I think I will on this one. In previous relationships, nothing upset me more than finding out that my girlfriend was sharing our personal business with her friends. It got so bad that I stopped telling her things because I knew it would end up on the evening news.

I can’t be the only one who’s ever dealt with this though. Maybe you tried to confide in your loved one that you wet the bed until your were 19. Or you may have told them about your fear of circus clowns, and that’s the real reason why you don’t eat at McDonald’s. Whatever it was, no matter how big or small, they shouldn’t have told…and that’s where the problem lies.

2. They act irresponsibly with money.

Have you ever been involved with someone who was irresponsible with money? Dealing with that is probably more frustrating than the time we had to find a tuxedo that fit Gary Coleman so he could be in my cousin’s wedding. (I think we ended up borrowing one from a wedding cake.) But back to the subject at hand…

I understand that we all mature at different paces when it comes to being able to manage finances, but their total lack of regard for managing money is extremely frustrating. Especially when they end up having to come and borrow some money from you. You end up doing it because you care, but deep down you just want to grab them by the shoulders and scream, “Get It Together!!!”

3. They lack ambition.

Perhaps the saddest one of them all is being in a relationship with someone who lacks ambition. You know the type. It seems like the only time they dream is when they go to sleep…and I don’t think that’s what you had in mind when you said you wanted to be with a dreamer. For those of us who actually want something out of life, it can literally drive you crazy being involved with someone like this.

I once dated a girl who had no goals. The only thing she wanted out of life was to meet Oprah one day….then her life would be complete. That’s about as shallow as Mike Tyson’s pool of vocabulary words. And while I can work with someone on the other relationship issues that may make you want to hurt your loved one, no ambition equals no love from the Fly Guy. Needless to say, I felt like a CBS radio exec as I dropped her faster than “Imus in the Morning.”

4. They constantly complain.

I enjoy being around complainers about as much as I enjoy watching replays of the OJ verdict. That feeling only gets intensified once you end up in a relationship with one. Even when things are going great, they always have to find something wrong with the situation. Either you don’t tell them I love you enough, or you now tell them I love you too much. It doesn’t matter what you do, because they’ll never be satisfied. In the end this leaves you at your wit’s end, and you find yourself listening to L.L. Cool J’s “Mamma Said Knock You Out,” each day before you interact with them.

The Fly Request- Now it’s time for me to hear from you. What irritates you about the one that you’re with? I mean we’re all human, so there must be something that the other person does to upset you from time to time. It doesn’t mean you don’t love them any less, it just means that there’s something that the two of you need to deal with. And if you’re still willing to be with them, in spite of this, then you might as well try to work on it.

So leave your comments below. I’m sure that once everyone gives their opinion, we’ll end up with a list longer than the line of creditors waiting to get their money from Michael Jackson.